January 26, 2009
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Dear Snippie #36 (Getting the sex started)
Question:
I want to know if you can figure out why it is that a person may want to make love to their S.O., but can’t find it in them to get the energy or the ummph to get it started. You see, It could actually go a very long time…like 2 weeks at a time without having taken place if the S.O. doesn’t get it started. But once it IS started it is out of this world one after the other orgasm? Is this pure laziness, or some sort of shyness…or…?
Thanks.Answer:
Well, all lot of people are just too tired to get the sex started. I wouldn’t take it personally. But if you want to have sex more often and your SO isn’t taking the lead then you may have too. You have to remember that know one knows what you’re thinking unless you tell them. So it sounds like you’re just going to have to take the lead in this area and get it started and not depend so much on your SO in that area.——————-
Your turn to answer Xangans!
Don’t forget to keep the sex questions coming.
Send them to snippiesblog@gmail.com and find out what everyone thinks without them knowing its you!
Please rec this post. It helps me get more questions. I can’t do these post without questions.
Snippie
Comments (63)
Wtf is SO and having sex?
No but seriously if you want it you have to go for it or else don’t bitch about it.
@AilinCorazon - significant other
It’s hard to tell if a woman or a man wrote this, however if it was a woman wanting her man to get things started… YOU definitely have to say something. Men do not get our “subtle” hints, so we have to be blunt!
Yeah, taking the initiative can be a challenge at times.
Just do what I do, slap your S.O. on the rear and say ‘You wanna’? That’s romantic and get’s the point across. It’s amazing I am married isn’t it.
Do you thank sex is passionful. I do ways of my life.
@bosefius - Sure is. Amazing, I mean; no romantic.
@bosefius - hahaha love it!
I think she should just tell them. Say “hey…gimme some luv rite nao! and when i look at you like this (insert look here) this means gimme some luv rite nao too!” That way he will know.
If this is a man, then same thing. yep.
Sex is only done by marrage not to be raped by a stranger.
Take off your clothes…this will get it started.
@CiaoBella810 - It’s not their flat, they need to know that.
@jewjewbeedragon - Oh. I know that to be true. Everytime I try to hint about ANYTHING. They look at me with this weird expression like I am an alien or something.
@jediwa72 - LMBO…your right its not their flat. but someone has to step up and take responsibility and let go of the flat that they hold! Now…commence to baby makin! Ahem…minus the babies, if your not into that sorta thing…
@bosefius - I know that’s a quality i look for in a man.
Sex makes babies. I’m not getting addicted to anyone because I’m so low that I’ll be his slave. Fuck them. They can fuck what they catch and be glued for eternity LOL
I would love to have sex on a guy who believes to be trueful. Who loves my sexual parts.
Exercise more. I found that sex was all the time when I had more stamina and energy and felt better health-wise.
@CiaoBella810 - Yeah, I’m dreamy
Classy and romantic.
@SnippiesBlog -
@RaVnR -
@jediwa72 - My pressure too. Any takers.
@SladeTheGreyFox - Yeah I agree with that with mine kind of sex.
The comments to this blew my mind…….
@jediwa72 - That will definitely get the party started lol
gotta wonder about partners not talking about needs………………….course it helps if you don’t talk about being tired all the time. He may just be trying to be considerate.
@dafeelingsinside - Yeah thats what, I am talking about
Also I am sexaul of my ass
Oh I ain’t going there….
good advice. I think that if you want it you need to go for it. It’s just like anything else in life. And yes, alot of times when you are totally exhausted you don’t feel like jumping into sex.
But, WHY CANT THEY READ MY MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!
Maybe they’re just not feeling in the mood for it. Just get it started when you want it and I’m sure they’ll get into it. Don’t worry about why your SO isn’t going for sex as often as you are. When he wants it, you’ll know.
@bosefius - Your wife probably feels like the luckiest woman on the planet.
But I agree, you need to be blunt when it comes to what you want, no matter if your male or female. Sometimes they just don’t know. And don’t rely on them to start. Sometimes they need to know that you want to which only happens when you initiate.
@bosefius - I love your idea!!!! LOL
I pretty much agree with everyone else about this one—-take control!
I have a similar issue with the girl never instigating sex.
So I get to the point where I wonder if she’s just “going along” with it for my sake. Which is something I don’t want.
Ladies… if you have a guy who you know LOVES sex and you’d like to have sex too… start it for him once in a while. Don’t always wait for him to make the first move.
It’s not hard. Climbing into his lap wearing nothing but your underwear. Reaching down and grabbing ahold of his junk. Just start sucking on his earlobe.
You don’t have to be subtle. And if the guy is turned off by this, go find a guy who likes women to be aggressive once in a while.
They do exist. Trust me.
Wife is always tired! I now how that goes, Just gotta wake ‘er up. I’d be a lonely waitin boy if I waited for her to instigate!
@Millsanicole - Pure romance right here, oh yeah
@lizheartshakespeare - Eh, it’s 10 years in March so she is either happy or can’t get out of the restraints
Sex is intersting subject to have sex with a guy or girl to bang you up.
@BMarie_354 - yeah jumpiing into sex is ansome to know thank-you.
“Come here, Woman,” has always worked fine for me.
Haha, sometimes in this world of supposed equality, someone might take offence to always having to take the lead.
We have this “code” if you will.. If I want to, I’ll ask if his ears are cold..? If he wants to he’ll mention ” hey, My ears are cold”.. if I dont want to, I’ll say “then put on a beanie”.. It’s that easy.
@MomGoneMadd - aww thats cute!
@bosefius - Either way I go, I come off sounding like a condescending you know what, so I’m just gunna leave that one alone…
@lizheartshakespeare - It’s ok, I joke around (obviously) a lot on here. She knows it and thinks it’s funny. Sorry if I came across as defensive, that was my sad attempt at humor.
@paoguy118 - You sir, are a true romantic, much like me. Why don’t women understand that?
@bosefius - no, no it wasn’t defensive. I just didn’t have many options for a reply.
@lizheartshakespeare - Ok, cool
@paoguy118 - love it sex now.
@bosefius - A lot of women appreciate it. You just never see those types on the View.
@paoguy118 - I love sex very much.
My partner decides what I need. That makes it easy because then I don’t have to get shut down 12 times a month for trying to tell her.
I would recommend someone loosing weight… or at least try exercising more often. Build up those muscles!!!
Here’s a quick sports nutrition/Sex ed lesson. Our body’s produce energy from 3 systems; anaerobic, aerobic, and phosphogen. The latter is an immediate source that depletes quickly, typically used in those short bursts (or the 1st few humps). Whereas the anaerobic system produces energy without oxygen, but only lasts a few minutes before lactic acid builds up and fatigue occurs. The key here is to achieve steady state exercise by use of aerobic energy (so you can screw all night long). Breathing hard (intake of 02 and exhale of CO2), sweating (pheromones, but that’s another lesson), increasing cellular demand for mitochondria, increasing available glucose, and a few candles with Barry White in the background… all contribute to stamina, endurance, libido, and turns those ‘uumphs’ into “YEEEAAAAHAAWWWWW’s!!!!” or big “Ooooooohhh’s” and “Awwwwws”, and “Who’s your Daddy” ect, ect.
BTW. I rec’d your post
I think you and your SO should take turns. I mean I have no problem going for it, but sometimes I like to be treated like a piece of meat.
@paoguy118 - Right, it’s like when I was single. I would walk up to a woman in a bar and say “Hey, let’s go hump” 9 times out of 10 I got slapped, but that 10th time was sheer magic
@ginsu417 - Smart man.
i like ur alice in wonderland pic, so cool… i mite put it as my desktop.
Look into that persons eyes and curl your lips into a slight smile and make a passionate rumbling growl lmfao i love fresh prince
Yea but you gotta get a lil aggresive sometimes lol =P ex. “GIMME WHAT I WANT NOW RAWR!” lol
Whoa. Is this question from a complete submissive? Sexual intercourse, generally, requires a minimum of two participants. It can also be initiated by any of the participants. You don’t have to wait for the other party to… uh, get the party started. In fact, the partner may appreciate the show of initiative. It could be that they feel like you’re not very attracted to them, if you only agree to sex and never request it. Heck, they may not be feeling very attractive and only ask for it when they can no longer stand foregoing it. Jump in head first, so to speak, and let your partner know what you want and need. Nobody’s going to read your mind, after all. And we all know the mind is our most prolific sexual organ.
well, I always figured you just start to get a little bit more affectionate
and move into it, if your SO isnt receptive, then they arent in the mood.
i thought all you need is a blunt object and an alarm clock
Initiate sex yourself. If one approach doesn’t work, try another! And next time, try something else. Variety!
yeah…..im not going to answer cuz i am not in this area
but heres a mini